Gender

I was born, then I was socialized to be male. Going into how this was done would take a whole book, so I'll just stick to the prompt and discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

I'll list the advantages that I've experienced, as a male, in a way that's similar to Peggy McIntosh's "White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack:"

1. My gender gets first introductions in mixed gendered groups meeting for the first time, and first "good-byes" upon leaving
2. If eye contact is made, people usually acknowledge me with a nod, wave, smile, etc.
3. People assume I know what is going on
4. People are less likely to talk about me behind my back or judge me upfront
5. Walking down the street, I am not prone to feeling eye-fucked by everyone
6. There are no expectations to how I should look
7. I do not have to smell "pretty"
8. People will listen to what I have to say, and not take it for granted

For now, that's all I can think of. But here are the disadvantages of being a male:

1. I can be called upon at anytime to defend myself from violent and aggressive people
2. I am expected to stick up for others in a disagreement
3. In my sex life, I am called upon to be the "dominant" person
4. I am expected to make the decisions
5. I must be independent to be worthwhile
6. Emotions, sensitivities, and insecurities must be kept to a visible minimum
7. Affectionate touch comes only from lovers
8. I can be drafted into the military
9. Drivers automatically assume I am spiting them and act aggressively toward me when I might accidentally cut them off or get too far into their path
10. People are less likely to have intimate discussions with me

Now, that's about all I can think of for how society perceives me as a male. I primarily identify as a queer, so I feel it's worthwhile visiting those advantages, then disadvantages:

1. I can dress in whatever feels right at that moment
2. I can be with whomever attracts me
3. I can disregard traditional roles in intimate and public settings
4. I can be expressive and emotional
5. I can be called upon for emotional support and caregiving, no matter what gender the person is who decides to call

Disadvantages:

1. The workplace is very hetero-normative and not always an easy place to be myself
2. I must explain what being "queer" means to a lot of people
3. I am called upon to justify my identity by relating non-heterosexual experiences
4. Some male, heterosexual friends act insecure or threatened by how I interact with them
5. Some female, heterosexual friends dismiss my being open to men as not having any interest in them

I am more attached to my gender-queer identity, although I cannot completely do away with the male gender people ascribe to me.

If I were a girl, and raised a girl, I'd assume life would have been a lot different. For one, my sister and I would probably have a better relationship. Secondly, I would probably be living at home or closer to home. I might still have found myself to be rebellious, being the younger child of the two, but who knows.

If I were to really consider this, I'd have to look at my sister's life. I might have just gone along for the academic ride, done what I was told, and became a teacher or found an area of interest in the medical field, since those professions both run in the family. However, I'd say I'm partly upon that path already. I've decided to not use my privilege and go across the states, in part so I can be more accountable to my family. I've learned massage therapy and now I'm on the path to studying nutritional science and/or sociology, which I plan on using to teach people. My life probably wouldn't be too materially different. It would be different in substance, however. I don't think I would have been through as many transformative situations as I have, in the sense that I've come to question class, gender, and race.